Tag: The Gifted Adult

An AHa moment, I think…

An AHa moment, I think…

I’m further along now in “The Gifted Adult”, currently reading about how we need to acknowledge our gifts.  It’s so interesting to me that denying abilities and other characteristics is a common trait amongst the gifted, that it’s somehow abnormal, or that we are anomalies of some kind, and not in a good way.

And that leads to the fact that I may acknowledge being gifted here in this venue but am not likely to say it too loud outside this “room”.

I also think it’s too early  to apply whatever talents I may have in one direction ie the organization I work in, or at least in what I’m currently doing within that company. And sad to say I don’t trust anyone enough here to talk to them about it.  As I read more on this topic that perspective becomes more reinforced, I’m still a newbie at performing in this role, a novice, a greenhorn or rookie.

Perhaps after I have a better idea of who I am and what I can/should do will I bust forth.  Patience my son, Patience.

To Leave, or Not to Leave (Work)? That is the question

To Leave, or Not to Leave (Work)? That is the question

I am growing increasingly disillusioned in my working career.  In my current read “The Gifted Adult” I am at a point where the topic is about striving for self-actualization, and how it is important (or very important) for many of the gifted.  I would like to reach that point in my life, no question, nevermind whether I’m gifted or not.  I have my doubts I can do it from here.  Is it possible, Yes.  Do I have the interest or energy, No.  I feel as if I’m spinning my wheels here, and I don’t know if it is only me or the management of me.  I suspect a little of both.  I, and my tasks, are handled poorly or nonexistently, leaving me to my own device, much as a ship without a rudder.  As you can likely pick up I am very frustrated

I am also afraid, afraid I will be found out and really afraid to leave on my own accord.  When you have been employed at what is essentially your only job for 37 years you become accustomed to many things, one of which is a steady income.  My pension will not be small but neither are my financial responsibilities.  It will likely mean a radical adjustment of my spending and current lifestyle, to which I’ve become very accustomed.

I believe I am making progress in personal/emotional life, the depression is still likely there but more subdued.  I am realizing things about myself, acknowledging others.  It’s opening my eyes to what “should be”, and that is also causing me concern.  One thing I’m sure of, “Fools rush in where Angels fear to tread” – Alexander Pope

Survived another trip

Survived another trip

Well we’ve made it back from camping in one piece.  As I suspected the crankiness wore off, I’m not even sure why I felt that way in the fist place.  My knickers were too tight perhaps.

I did a bit more reading of The Gifted Adult and it has some compelling descriptions, some of how I see myself.  One in particular talks of a gentlemen who feels angry inside, but he hides it well and no one is the wiser.

  • He sits in meetings and wonders how they can go over the same things over and over again without coming to a conclusion or making a decision.
  • He wants to stand up and yell.
  • Co-worker’s eyes glaze over when he talks of fresh ideas, and yet some time later they come up with the same concept and it is somehow their epiphany.

I can so relate.

I’m currently at the chapter where the author discusses the gifted persons need for self actualization, according to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. I do feel like I should be accomplishing something, most days I feel like I’m spinning my wheels.  I hate coming to work, it’s mind numbing (almost spelled dumbing, how’s that for a Freudian slip?).  I’m sure I could find things in my job to challenge me but I have no interest, I’m tired of being here and cannot rouse even the smallest interest in growing my position.  Some of this may be the depression, I think it’s more that I’m just plain tired of being here.

I often think of leaving my job, taking retirement and damning the consequences.  The financial hit could be considered substantial in some books, but I also think that if I would then be happy it would all be worth it.  Isn’t that the way it should be?  I believe I am trapped by my belongings, my things. They often seem to own me as opposed to me owning them.  But I am afraid, and as a result I do nothing except lament what could be.  This may be a topic for me to discuss with Gloria.

Interesting book – "The Gifted Adult"

Interesting book – "The Gifted Adult"

I bought a good book while in Toronto a week or so ago. It’s called “The Gifted Adult: A Revolutionary Guide for Liberating Everyday Genius”. I say good because I think it will answer many of the questions I have, give me some new questions, and provide with food for thought. I hope I can pass on some of what I expect to learn.